> Subject: Wife 1.0.

> Dear Tech Support:
> >
> >  Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and
> >  noticed that the new program began unexpected child
> >  processing that took up a lot of space and valuable
> >  resources.  No mention of this phenomenon was included in
> >  the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself
> >  into all other programs and launches during system
> >  initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
> >
> >  Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Drunken Boys Night
> >  2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the
> >  system whenever selected.
> >
> >  I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while
> >  attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I
> >  am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the
> >  uninstall does not work on this program. Can you help me,
> >  please!!!
> >
> >  Thanks,
> >
> >  Joe
> >
> >  Tech Support response:
> >
> >  Dear Joe:
> >
> >  This is a very common problem men complain about but is
> >  mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade
> >  from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0
> >  is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program.
> >
> >  Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator
> >  to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge
> >  Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0.
> >
> >  Hidden operating files within your system would cause
> >  Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained.
> >
> >  It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program
> >  files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to
> >  Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.
> >  Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but
> >  end up with more problems than the original system. Look in
> >  your manual under "Warnings Alimony/Child Support,"
> >
> >  I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the
> >  situation. I am thinking of having Wife 1.0 installed
> >  myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section
> >  regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume
> >  all responsibility for fault and problems that might occur,
> >  regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be
> >  to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.
> >
> >  In any case avoid excessive use of the Esc key because
> >  ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command
> >  before the operating system will return to normal.  The
> >  system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for
> >  all the GPFs.  Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high
> >  maintenance.
> >
> >  Consider buying additional software to improve the
> >  performance of Wife 1.0.  I recommend Flowers 2.1 and
> >  Chocolates 5.0.  Do not, under any circumstances, install
> >  Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported
> >  application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible
> >  damage to the operating system.
> >
> >  Best of luck,
> >
> >  Tech Support


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